
Miguel Montero - I like Montero's 17 Home Runs, but that doesn't mean I am going to put him ahead of anyone else on this list because his Batting Average is still a little sub-par. He is still a very viable option in case the others are off the board.
Anyhoo, I have been most fortunate to catch many Nebraska games this year. Many of them have been on the television here in New York City which helped me follow the dominance of one man, Ndamukong Suh. Trust me I have watched all of the great Nebraska players over my brief tenure as a Nebraska fan, 31 years is still a short tenure compared to most. But I have never seen someone blow-up a line of scrimmage every time like he does, and I have created players on video games that don't dominate the way he does.
They were one drive away from beating Virginia Tech, they were one fumble away from beating Iowa State, and most importantly they were one second away from beating the Texas Longhorns and winning the Big12 Championship.
From the information that we were able to gather we selected some of our favorite clips from people who have taken in during he Yankee windfall but still had the audacity to say these mean things about the Yankees. They may be true but they will definitely create their own kind of buzz.
“Today was a beautiful July morning in Tampa. I awoke at 11 AM and made myself some toast. While buttering the toast I felt tightness in my shoulder, I went over to my to-do list and put down SEE THE TRAINER and thought about visiting the east coast later this month. It has been three years since I have been to New York and I bet the guys would love to see me, they always say things like 'nice to see you' and 'long time no see'.”
If you ask me, he is full of it, and the Knicks know it. No one wants his services, except maybe that Greek team, and his attitude in the club house and the press he brings with him is enough to disturb any well oil machine trying to make a playoff run.


Now that we have a legitimate ace on the staff, the prospect of Opening Day 2009 grows even more exciting. To appreciate just how important of an accomplishment this is for Brian Cashman and the boys, let’s take a look back at some of the all-out misfires the Yankees have made in the not-too-distant past while testing the free agent waters for starting pitching.
Warning: Some of the following names may induce severe bouts of rage and/or depression for the average Yankees fan. Please proceed with caution.
5. Kenny Rogers (1996). “The Gambler” spent just two seasons in the Bronx before being traded to Oakland for the infamous “player to be named later,” and never quite lived up to the buzz that stemmed from tossing a perfect game for the Rangers in 1994. Sure, the Yankees won their first World Series in 18 years during Rogers’ first season in pinstripes, but this was no thanks to Kenny, who never reached later than the third inning of any of his postseason starts that year. As everyone in Yankeeland knows, October futility will get you shipped out of town faster than Julia Roberts’ run on Broadway (unless you make $25 million a year and have fabulous highlights in your hair).
Since leaving the Yankees, Rogers showed why he doesn’t belong on America’s Team by doing his best Sean Penn/Randy Johnson impersonation and attacking an on-field cameraman during a pre-game warm-up in 2005. A silver lining in this failed acquisition? That “player to be named later” from Oakland turned out to be 1998 World Series MVP Scott Brosius. Thanks, Kenny.
4. Jaret Wright (2004). Did Brian Cashman bump his head and think he was back in 1997 when he pursued Wright to help bolster the Yankees rotation four years ago? Long gone was the cocky Cleveland Indian fireballer who flustered the Bronx Bombers in his first ever postseason appearance (’97 ALDS). Instead, Yankees fans were treated to a fifth starter who took the phrase “laboring on the mound” to a brand new level. With one eye glued to the scoreboard at the old stadium you would almost, almost, feel bad for the guy as the number on the Duane Reade pitch-counter climbed into the 40s and even 50s in just the second inning.
Watching Jaret Wright trying to retire the side was like watching Jimmy Fallon attempting to make it through a sketch on Saturday Night Live without smirking or even cracking up altogether. They would both make you shudder with disgust.
So, where is this mistake of an acquisition now? After failing to make the pitching-challenged Pittsburgh Pirates squad last spring, Wright is looking for work and wondering why Cashman won’t return his phone calls anymore.

The big righty’s worst moment in pinstripes came in pivotal Game 5 of the 2003 World Series against the Marlins. When starter David Wells went down with an injury after just one inning, Contreras came on in “relief” to promptly get rocked for three quick runs in the second, setting the tone for the rest of the game.
The biggest burn of the Contreras signing? After giving up on the overpriced hurler, the Yankees traded him along with cash to the White Sox during the 2004 season, only receiving (gulp) Esteban Loaiza in return. Contreras found a rebirth in Chicago and went on to help the Sox win the World Series in 2005. We don’t need to mention how the Yankees have fared since then.
2. Kei Igawa (2007). Oh no, the Red Sox just forked over big bucks to sign a Japanese pitcher, now we have to get one too. Such was the thinking when the Yankees shelled out $26 million just to talk to Igawa about signing a 4-year, $20 million contract. Add everything up and you get . . . the highest paid Triple-A pitcher in the history of baseball.
Is there anything more to say about this one? Someone, anyone, please just take him away!

No one could blame Cashman and The Boss for throwing money at Pavano—he was the most sought-after free agent starter on the market at the end of the 2004 season, not to mention a Yankee-stopper in the 2003 World Series while pitching for the Marlins—but seriously, how could this one have turned out any worse? Pavano jumps out of the bullpen and picks a fistfight with one of the right field Bleacher Creatures?
Now that it’s all said and done, and Pavano’s stint with the Yankees has mercifully drawn to a close, the final numbers speak for themselves on what a colossal bust this signing turned out to be: 4 years, 26 games started, 9-8, 5.00 ERA. When the dust settles, Carl walks away from all of this with a cool $39.95 million in his pocket. That equates to roughly $1.54 million per start. A few more financial debacles like this one, and the Yankees may be next in line for a federal bailout.